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Thursday, September 29, 2016

A dust-bunny in paperback's clothing

One thing about creative writing: it makes you read with your eyes wide open. The shortcomings and follies of other writers tend to become far more obvious when your “internal editor” is active. Lately I've been toying with short fiction while I work up a major novel in the form of reams of notes ... and in the same time frame (six or twelve months), I find myself growling much more over what I read.

We own a lot of books. Some are read repeatedly, others are shelf-sitters, dust-gatherers ... “dust-bunnies,” if you will ... and some deserve to have been on the shelf for decades, without the cover being lifted! Brace yourself for a book review. Here we go:

In every way, Pindharee by Joel Richards (Tor, 1986) is an example of how not to write a novel. The only area in which it succeeds is in the basic story idea, or “plot driver.” The project begins with a marvelous idea; its failure is in the execution of the idea.

In the most basic terms, Pindharee is a massive concept, not deserving but requiring at least a normal-length, full novel to develop it properly. An absolute minimum of ~100k words would have been appropriate, and if the author were predisposed, he could have generated a “thick” and quite possibly come up with a novel long remembered as that rarest of beasts, an utterly original idea in a genre where concepts have been re-re-recycled for close to a century.

Instead, Joel Richards hammered his vast (potential) plot into what I’ll term “the world’s longest short story;” and one can only wonder why this was packaged as a paperback novel ... or published at all, since it’s such a monumentally unsatisfying read, suffering from so many maladies, it was doomed to one- or two-star reviews as the crated copies exited the warehouse on trucks bound for the bricks-and-mortal bookstores. No ebook here: trees gave their lives for this.

The only way to shoehorn an epic story into a narrative around 50k words is to abbreviate everything from sentence structure on up. Between Pindharee’s covers, critical scenes are raced through in lightning shorthand; character development is little or absent; world building is under-cooked; enormous new concepts are routinely tossed into the mix with inadequate introduction and insufficient development. At the level of sentence construction, the paring-down of the language sometimes impairs the actual meaning: readers can interpret a statement two or three ways, which constitutes bad writing. The finale is merely a jumble of tossed-together ideas, jotted down the way a writer makes notes for scenes he intends to build; Richards never wrote those scenes. 

Short story narrative must often be brief to the point of brusqueness: when a manuscript is cut to meet editors’ requirements, the first thing consigned to the wall is the artistry of language. Mr. Richards began the abbreviational process on page one. By p216, writing that was choppy throughout became almost unreadable, sometimes unintelligible, with paragraphs reduced to bundles of sketchy ideas and sentence fragments. To worsen matters, the writing is often sloppy: repeated words, lazy sentence structure with far too many "thats" and, as the real kicker, pages devoted to judo, which makes little sense to anyone outside the sport.

The astonishment is, Tor actually published Pindharee in this form. At the same time as jacketing such poor material, they rejected newcomers with better-done books. Joel Richards is a pen name of Joel Richard Fruchtman (http://www.sf-encyclopedia.com/entry/richards_joel), who is credited with several short stories. Pindharee is his sole novel, and I wonder if it was published as a favor to a “pal in the business” … which publishers frequently do, though they’ll categorically deny it. 

Though the idea is massive, the plotting is skimpy in the extreme. Key concepts are sometimes scant hints, even remarks dropped in dialog, from which one puzzles together a meager backstory: 

In an era of galactic expansionism, humans are hell-bent on colonizing any appropriate world. Advancement in Earth’s political arena hinges on individual success in a military dedicated to exploration -- officers murder to win credit for discoveries and alien contact operations. The Fairbairn charts Lydia, where a perfect, dreamlike city seems abandoned, its people vanished, rendering this garden world prime real estate. In fact, the human-doppleganger population has evolved through science, to psi tech. They dance rings around the intruders in their determination not to be colonized, and their powers will reach back to Earth to ensure their liberty. 

But yes, the ideas driving the story are immense. I’ll give Pindharee two stars (out of five) because I remain impressed by the concepts though I finished the novel growling. Also, I actually finished it, whereas I could mention A Quiet of Stone by Stephen Leigh. I've never been able to get more than 25pp through, in 30 years, because (at least to me) it's so bloody boring. 

Pindharee would benefit from speed reading, where ideas leap out but no one stops to enjoy the language and denouement. If you want a good read, leave this on the shelf -- it’s one of a very few novels I’ve actually disliked, in five decades of serious reading. However, if you teach a creative writing course and want to demonstrate how not to craft a novel ... grab Pindharee. Believe it or not, you can actually still get a copy on Amazon.

In the lull in the storm --

Dave and I couldn't resist heading over to have a look at the sea, in the lull in the storm, and I grabbed the camera on the way out the door. Heading down Beach Road, the view was dramatic before you even reached the Esplanade --

Massive waves crashing at the end of Beach Road.
We parked and stepped out into the teeth of a 30mph wind. You could lean on it, and it was extremely cold -- colder than Jen had expected, since it's actually not cold at all when you're not right on the coast. The waves really were massive:

Huge waves off Adelaide's metropolitan beaches.
 Looking south across Noarlunga Bay, you were impressed by just how these coasts are being hammered:

Noarlunga Bay being pounded yet again. September 2016.
Spume piles up, in some areas right onto the boardwalks ... the sea is breaking at your feet.
And of course, "it's an ill wind," as they say. The surfers are happy. They were still arriving in many places along the shore by the time we'd had enough...

Surfer at Christies Beach
Good for him. Meanwhile, Dave and I were just about to call it, and one of us was growing very cold indeed. Another photographer was on the boardwalk, getting essentially the same photos, and he and Dave traded off, so we all have snapshots of each other to mark the occasion:

Dave and Jen in the lull in the big storm, September 2016.
And by this point, it was time for hot chocolate -- seriously! Fortunately, we were only a matter of minutes from a safehaven:

Beck's Bakehouse
And Beck's Bakehouse has a very nice line in hot chocolate. Notice how bundled-up the other patrons are, in the background of this shot:

Hot chocolate. Life saver.
Delicious. Suitably revived, it was time to head back out into the wind and the chill of the foreshore...

Portrait of the photographer, in the car window. 30mph is blowing out here!
The wild weather is not good for seabirds. Populations nest at the mouth of the Onkaparinga River, and the site is taking a beating. Many gulls have given up and gone inland, where they're roosting with pigeons beside swollen and still-rising creeks. These, below, are toughing it out, but they're swirling around by the thousand, in barely organized chaos:

Silver gulls flocking at the Onkaparinga outfall
 And before anyone relaxes, just take a look into the south, or southwest (below). Uh huh, we're weathering up again. The rain began before we were home, and the local creeks are rising rapidly...

Weathering up again, ready for the next wave of this storm.
That's it for this episode.  I'll sign out with a windblown selfie, in the car, somewhere out there in the arctic wilds!

 The photographer in person.

Wednesday, September 28, 2016

The fifty year storm

Quite a drama unfolded last afternoon, and on into the night. I was doing art while a "fifty year storm" barreled in off the Southern Ocean, and Dave had been out for a bike ride before it hit. He was home about twenty minutes after the rain began. What we thought of as a torrential downpour was barely the beginning. About 3:45pm, the lights flickered, flickered again, and the power went off. Uh huh. Here we go (photos below are form the media: Bureau of Meteorology, ABC etc. Not my work, guys -- I was tucked up at home, warm and dry!) ...

The storm crossing Brighton Beach ... this was our local beach until just four years ago, when we moved...
...and a wing of the same storm looms over Woomera, faaaar away in the interior.
The big picture, as seen by the the Himawari weather satellite. It's being classified as a cyclone.
A cyclone??? Off the Southern Ocean??? This Does. Not. Happen. Except, apparently now it does. The way we don't get tornadoes here. Not ever. But one was caught on video by a farmer up at Blyth, which is too close to the Clare Valley for comfort. Stuff is happening that no one never saw before.

(Climate change? I know ... many people are in denial, and it's easy to say, "If we lived a thousand year lifespan we'd have seen it before, therefore it's normal." But it ain't so simple. We've been getting "the storm of the decade" every year, twice a year, for some time now. This one is being called the "fifty year" storm ... and soon such events will be commonplace. That is what's abnormal -- not a storm in itself. The frequency of them. Like it or not, things are changing.)

Boiled down to a tale fitting into a thimble, what happened is this:  severe weather (over 100,000 lightning strikes) caused the main power generators to "trip." They scrammed, it took many hours to get 'em back online. Twenty-two power transmission pylons were totaled; the whole state of South Australia blacked out  -- yep, there's hell to pay, that this can happen to so vast an area. The how and why, and what to do about it, will be beaten up for days. Hopefully, something will be done. Soon.

Next day, there's still thousands of homes without power, and the sting in the tail of the storm isn't yet spent . Our power came back on after about five hours in the dark -- we were lucky. Got the central heating on at once, because things got very cold. Today, rain continues to lash; thunder and hail are forecast for this afternoon. Dave and I will run errands in the lull, be back inside when the "fun" starts ... with a good supply of candles, flashlights, batteries and fully-charged mobile devices. Like last night, when he, I and Mike played candlelight poker.  

So let's get this uploaded before anything dramatic happens! This was yesterday's weather map, just as the storm came in:


Thank gods, today's map just looks like a lot of rain. Things are okay in Old Reynella ... and I'm glad to say that the backyard is sheltered enough for the purple flag iris not to have been destroyed. I was out there gardening, weeding, pruning, taking photos, in the gorgeously warm "calm before the storm" -- it was like a summer's morning, and I have the pictures to prove it.

A cyclone, in South Australia?

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Turtle spotting!


Yes, you read that right ... turtle spotting. In fact, Murray River turtles. There's quite a large and thriving colony of them in Playford Lake at Belair NP; and when the sun shines ... and when that sun is at just the right angle to strike into the water --




Sometimes you see them, sometimes you don't. They might be right there, but the sun's at the wrong angle; they also might be down deep, in which case all you see is a stream of bubbles. When they surface, sometimes they come up for a split second -- especially if they're very close to humans and catch a glimpse of you, in which case they're gone in a flash. Other times, they bask on the surface, but only way out in the lake, where you need a loooong lens to reach them.

Of course, turtles aren't the only critters around:

Talk about luck! Capture a dragonfly in flight ...
suuure, I planned this (ahem!)
A Little Raven, with bright blue eyes
A White Faced Heron ... fisherman on the lake.
A Darter, drying off in one of the big trees overhanging Playford Lake.
There are always birds galore, and when the sun shines it's a birder's and photographer's playground. It's also a lovely walk, and you meet some interesting people, usually walking an assortment of dogs, everything from the cattle dog and border collie to the huskies and malamutes...

Golden wattle
At this time of the year it's golden wattle season ... in other words, sneezin' season. Take a box of kleenex along: chances are, you'll need them! But the "enchanted forest effect" is well worth the sneezing:

On the Wood Duck Walk in spring, Playford Lake, Belair NP.
We'd packed a picnic, and after this hike and photo op we headed over to the Echo Tunnel area -- an old, rather creepy tunnel through the hillside, right under the main Belair rail line -- for a picnic before the mandatory walk through the tunnel. I'll blog that part of the story next time!


Saturday, September 24, 2016

Stop blathering, just show me the pictures!

Do I talk too much? It's been said ... it happens when one has a lot to say! But on the other hand, I've been seeing the sense of a "just the pictures" blog for some time. So --


-- here it is: the product of a flash of inspiration and a sloooow Sunday. No blather about when and where and how and who! Just the pictures, and plenty of them. I chucked fifty into the empty new template earlier. Next weekend I'll do another fifty ... and so on.

Here's the address: JUST THE PICTURES ... enjoy!

I'll, uh, stop talking now.

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Hey, I did it!


Hey ... I actually did it. After all these years. Facebook. I mean, for me this is waaay out there. I've been able to see the sense of blogging for the better part of a decade, because it brings out the diarist in me. But social media has never really been "my thing," partly because I'm rather a private person, and partly because I lead a boring, boring life with very little to talk about.

Example:

What did I do today? Cleaned bathrooms. Repeatedly. Of necessity. I'm a care giver ... don't ask.

Facebook keeps asking, What's on your mind? You want the diplomatic handout or the truth? Okay, then, both. The diplomatic handout first: "The poems of James Elroy Flecker are on my mind --"

Night on the bloodstained snow: the wind is chill:
And there a thousand tombless warriors lie,
Grasping their swords, wild-featured. All are still.
Above them the black ravens wheel and cry.
A brilliant moon sends her cold light abroad:
Hialmar arises from the reddened slain,
Heavily leaning on his broken sword,

And bleeding from his side the battle-rain.

...and it would be true that this poem did rush through my mind two hours ago for about seven seconds, for some odd reason. But what's on my mind now as facebook poses the question, is, "I need to get a new toilet brush." 

Now, what kind of  facebook post do you call that? A toilet brush. Boring. Perhaps even mildly disillusioning. Yet, true, LOL.

Anyway: here's me on facebook. I finally did it!

Monday, September 19, 2016

Birding ... with smoked oysters and peanut butter

Darter at Playford Lake, Belair national Park
An walk in Belair National Park and a picnic basket (loaded with home-made peanut butter, oatmeal crackers, and a can of smoked oysters) turned into an awesome opportunity to photograph birds. Dave and I have been keen "birders" for some years now, so any opportunity to photograph them is welcome; and yesterday they were out in profusion. This is the first time I've had the chance to photograph a darter (above), but now I know where they hang out, I'll be sure to get back there on a bright, blue-sky day! Fortunately, we're only about twenty minutes from the park, so with a tad bit of luck we can pick the day and run. Yesterday was not a good day for cameras.

Yesterday was white sky and light levels were far lower than the sensitive human eye actually registered... until we were actually halfway back to the car, of course. The Adelaide Hills are high enough that you can often drive into very different weather conditions as you head up. A day that's bright on the coast can be overcast "up there."  So --

Australian wood ducks with ducklings
Black faced miner
-- shots like these, above, were an absolute crapshoot. You just grabbed what you could, crossed fingers, and sorted them out later.  Then the sun came out when we were on our way back to the car and out of time, and suddenly the images are like this:

rainbow lorikeet
Australian magpie ... bumming for those smoked oysters
Waterfowl are thriving just now, with Playford Lake so full, the spillways are still running; and there are ducklings galore:

Pacific black duckling
But more this spring than in other years, we're seeing alarming levels of hybridization between duck species. The European mallard was introduced to this country in 1860-ish, because it was fancied by hunters (what a surprise); but little did they suspect that the mallard can interbreed with virtually every native duck. So you start off with the pure bred mallard -- and this one, below, is close:

mallard, close to pure-bred
... and in a few years, after Mother Nature has taken her course, you wind up with a very motley crew indeed, like this flotilla, all hanging out together, deliriously happy, and in a charming, harlequin disarray:

hybrid mallards
Some of those ducks are utterly unidentifiable! They're lovely birds, but you can spend a half hour poring over the books, trying to figure out what they are, and end ... mystified. Get out there by any lake, and you'll come up with something like this lovely girl --

Part mallard, part Pacific Black, part domestic duck. Pretty, at any rate.
...and one can only conclude, she's a bit of this, a bit of that. The ducks themselves don't mind a bit, but the fauna experts in this country are somewhat concerned that in another few years there won't be a pure-bred duck left in the wild. The thing is, there's zip to be done about it. Learn to embrace diversity, perhaps, as the ducks have already done! For the record, the Australian wood ducks, second from the top, with ducklings, and these Pacific black ducks, below, are pure:

Pacific Black Ducks
 And of course, the mallards can't interbreed with the swamp hens, moor hens and coots, so there's no danger to those populations. This guy (or gal; how do you tell the genders apart, with coots??), below, is a Eurasian coot:

Eurasian coot
 I should think the coots don't have a problem telling the genders apart, of course...

Eastern rosella
This shot at left is actually not a good picture at all; it's just the best one I was likely to get on a white-sky day when one was lamenting the light levels! Of the six or eight kinds of parrots you can see at Belair National Park, we saw four types yesterday and got the opportunity to photograph just two: the rainbow lorikeet, fourth from the top, and this little guy here: an eastern rosella. The rosellas are shyer than the lorikeets; they never show up in your backyard, and don't hang out in large numbers. The lorikeets can actually be thugs (and will strip your plum trees, if you let them), but the rosellas are very quiet and likely to vanish on sight of a camera. They're very difficult to photograph even on a bright day, and yesterday? Lucky to get a shot at all, much less one that's at the very least in focus, even if it's too "soft" to be what I'd call a good shot. Hey ho.

Must try again on a brilliant day. October's a great time for photographing wild flowers down here, so we'll be back in the park several times...

Thursday, September 15, 2016

Cleaning up flood damage ... while the sun shines

The day after the high winds and torrential rains Dave and I went south along the coast to check out conditions as the bad weather blew over.





One day after, the rivers were still right up to the roads in many cases. The "water over road" signs were still out, and you saw the lakes of mud where cascades had streamed across, but mostly -- mostly -- folks are down to a clean-up job, while emergency services work on removing broken trees. The good thing is, the community has come out in force, in the hardest-hit areas, to help people who've been underwater. One can only imagine what it must be like to be very old, or sick, or both, and have cold, mucky water rising around your knees and ruining everything you possess. The thought makes you shudder.

But in those hardest-hit areas, it'll to take a lot longer to fix the damage. I've borrowed this image from the ABC news website ...

Full credit to ABC News -- their copyright etc. 
...that is, or rather was, Montacute road. The floods must have washed out the foundations and the road collapsed. This one will take months to fix. If you'd like to read the whole story online, you'll find it here ... and one of their pictures was also on the front page of the state's newspaper:

Normally, Koalas don't pay much attention to rain. They live in the tops of trees and just dig in with their three-inch claws and go right back to sleep. But when the trees are really thrashing, they'll probably have to come down -- or perhaps this little guy was in a tree that actually fell. Either way, he found himself swimming for it, and taking refuge on a fence post; a very bedraggled little thing indeed.

(One hopes Fauna Rescue managed to get him to high ground, make sure he's okay. What makes koalas' lives doubly hard is that in a matter of weeks our temperatures will be so high, the forest so dry, their problems are all about thirst and bushfires; and koalas aren't as highly mobile as kangaroos, who can just get up and go when they must. Still, koalas are more agile, and much faster, than you'd guess. We've seen them on the ground and bounding along. They also have no road sense, and in fact many country roads have "look out for koalas" signs. It's quite an experience when one strolls out in the road right in front of you, in the dead of night. Good job on the brakes, Dave!)

Credits to the ABC photographers for this shot, and the image of Montacute Road ... or rather, the yawning pit where Montacute Road ought to be! See the link above.

Further south and  on the coast, the damage was more about erosion -- dunes have been cut away. It takes years to build up a good, strong system of dunes to reclaim and stabilize some coastline. One of these "super storms," as they're calling it, can undo the work of decades. One wants to say, "Well, the dunes will build back up, as they did the first time." Left alone, yes, they would. But these "storm of the decade" events are coming through every year now, and sometimes two or three times per year. The old "storm of the decade" is now commonplace; which bodes ill for the dunes. Sigh.

Here we are, finding the Okaparinga River returned to its channel today, leaving the surrounds a quagmire...
Home -- looks like it's been snowing. Hail, like the last such pics I posed? Nope. Blossom. The trees are stripped.
We were lucky. We suffered no damage whatever, and the worst we can complain of is that the wild winds stripped the trees of spring blossom. It was only September 2, fourteen days ago, when I posted this. All gone now. Well ... botheration. But yes, we were lucky -- and grateful for it...

And then the sun shone, the clouds vamoosed over the horizon, and now it's warm and bright. Dang.
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